In our old house, when I couldn't sleep, I would sit on the couch in the living room and stare out the window. Out of that window I could see our section of the street lit up by a street light. The street light was almost directly across the street from our house. Our street was quiet at night and most nights I would not see a single car.
I would stare at that spot on the corner across the street and just be aware of the emptiness and quiet. I would imagine that I was sitting or standing on that corner and how no one in the world would know I was there if I did. I of course would ponder the emptiness and reality that no one knew I was sitting on my couch looking out the window. It was my secret. Now that I write this I realize I had done the same kind of exercise in my teen years. I would sneak out side for a smoke and watch our street. The street I grew up on was different in that it was busier; much busier than that street lamp street. But from where I stood next to the house, I was in complete shadowed darkness and no one would have seen me as they passed, save for the glowing end of my cigarette if they happened to look in just the right spot, 20 or so yards from the street.
Of course, in niether situation did I think much about what I was doing as practicing Zen, but I think I was. I was aware of my surroundings and pondering the nothingness of everything.
No comments:
Post a Comment